Tentacle Tango Review (PC)

Because what could be worse than having to control eight legs? Why, controlling sixteen legs, of course. And yet, annoyingly, Tentacle Tango wasn’t built with the intention of making such tasks easy, but to be irritating and forthright, adorable and frustratingly blasé. At no point did it want to be a success story, but an unforgiving affair that would put friendships to the test and, with the incompetence of its octo-like antics, dismantle them piece by piece, tentacle by tentacle.

Behind the veil of Tentacle Tango’s seemingly simple and harmless exterior is a rage game that wants to be scolded. Initially, it strikes you as being a soothing co-op endeavor that thrives on your small victories, even if, say, said victories often require a lot of strategic effort to achieve. But then it hits you, almost like a slap to the face when you least expect it; an oily tentacle sprouts up from beneath the woodwork, and it enlightens you on the fact that life, sadly, isn’t as joyful as you thought it was. What entails thereafter is a series of downfalls and drastic consequences, slick maneuvers and epic failures. And yes, it is a rage game.

Tentacle Tango is, to some extent, Stuck Together with octopi instead of hip-locked toys. The concept, however, more or less remains the same: two players, tethered to the same burden, have to endure a stream of painfully taxing obstacles and physics-based set pieces that have no place in a bashful society. There are playful sandboxes to thwart, enemies to conquer, and more than enough precision-based gaps to lunge over with a good old-fashioned combination of anger and commitment. Again, like Stuck Together, but with a deceptively inviting exterior that knows all too well how to trick you into falling into its clutches.

It Takes Two

Tentacle Tango pits two unfortunate octopi against one rather evil chef—Chef Murgó, sorry—in a brutal and often unforgiving tentacle-addled world where obstacles belittle efforts and friendships disintegrate to the frequent scream of despair. Here, both you and your friend have the monumental job of slipping, sliding, and ricocheting through a jam-packed suite in an effort to thwart Chef Murgó and, with any luck, flee from the clutches of an irritatingly barbaric realm of inconsiderate wonders of a not-so-nautical sort.

The idea here may be simple, but that isn’t to say that it’s easy to execute, well, any of the maneuvers. See, Tentacle Tango does you a major inconvenience by joining both you and your accomplice together, meaning, you cannot act under your own free will, and you cannot, under any circumstances, throw caution to the wind and slither off on your own accord. No, because that would be too easy. Lest we forget that Tentacle Tango is, first and foremost, a rage game, and as such, it would be nothing without a few lousy curveballs to put you off your game. It just so happens that in Tentacle Tango, the biggest curveball is your friend. It’s just as well that there’s a single-player mode, then. Hallelujah? Not really.

In the handful of hours that you mindlessly romp through the spring-loaded world of Tentacle Tango, you not only have the job of holding your friend’s hand as they slip deeper and deeper into a perpetual state of madness, but also working in tandem to tackle various objects, most of which require a well-oiled grip and a lot of dumb luck. Failure is to be expected here, naturally, but putting the game down is a no-no, and about as much of a mistake as the game’s elusive promise to give you a breather when you need it most. Again — rage game. It’s best not to let it dampen your spirits, to be honest.

Tethered by Tentacles

While the mechanics aren’t all that difficult to learn in Tentacle Tango, the act of executing them in a swift and progressive manner is, on the other hand, a pain in the backside. Thankfully, there are only four button prompts to master, two of which control the tentacles, and two of which alternate between characters and maneuvers. That isn’t the problem; it’s figuring out how to weave them all into one slick combination, that’s the problem.

Difficulty curve aside, Tentacle Tango has some great visual effects and level designs, with a vibrant and, again, seemingly harmless composition that is, in spite of all its curveballs, a great deal of fun to work through. Of course, it’s often hard to picture the heart of its canvas when you’re gazing through red mist, but the fact still remains: Tentacle Tango is, gracefully, a good-looking co-op game that delivers a ton of great details.

Speaking of details, Tentacle Tango also comes with a selection of neat features, including a speed running mode, achievements, and a global leaderboard. Small appliances, true, but enough to enhance the replay value, nonetheless. That is, of course, providing that you would want to come back to take another swing at the apex after beating it.

Verdict

Tentacle Tango may look harmless and bashful, but the bitter truth is that, despite it being in receipt of some genuinely adorable characteristics and set pieces, it isn’t quite as therapeutic as it initially lets on. Yet, like a lot of rage games that promise you the weight of the world in exchange of your unbinding commitment to success, it seeks various ways to keep you coming back for another attempt. Don’t get me wrong, it’s still a friggin’ frustrating experience that takes its toll on you after you’ve been hit with its oily tentacles for an hour or two. That said, it does keep you entwined with its journey through small pockets of hopeful territories and milestones. And then, true to the nature of rage games, it crushes them.

Of course, if you enjoy pain and soul-crushing defeats, then you’ll no doubt be more than eager to sign the waiver and buddy up with your local octopi to endure a few rounds of inevitable disappointment. If you lack the patience and the heart, however, then you might want to heed my warning and give Tentacle Tango a wide berth to avoid any further embarrassment. Or better yet, spend your time marveling at the majestic visuals and don’t traipse any further. Thank me later.