Candy Crush Review (Android & iOS)

I won’t sugarcoat it; Candy Crush is as irresistibly sweet as it is incredibly easy to develop a rolling partnership with. It’s almost impossible not to crave something so cute and vibrant, either, as it makes such a simple concept feel both immensely appealing and, under the right circumstances, perfect for curing your boredom or any internal roadblocks. Take the statistics, for instance. With over five billion downloads and somewhere in the vicinity of two hundred million active users, you don’t just have a fleeting idea; you have the everlasting gobstopper of mobile puzzlers. In other words, you have the Willy Wonka of Android and iOS applications. The only ingredient missing from Candy Crush is a musical ballad and a flying glass elevator that can go sideways and slantways, and longways and backways. Grandpa Joe, however, remains embodied as roughly half of the human population. Well, probably.

If you haven’t heard of Candy Crush, then one can only truly describe it as a dopamine-inducing match-three puzzle game with candy-bloated visuals, sweet audio effects, and an annoyingly more-ish catalog that boasts well over twenty thousand levels, give or take. The goal, much like you traditional match-three title, is to manipulate columns (or stacks of candy, in this case) and assemble confectionary of a specific kind in order to squash a column and effectively clear the board. Conceptually, it isn’t all that different from what you would have seen before. Candy Crush, however, sidelines the classic block format and instead uses colorful treats and sugary snacks as its primary centerpiece. Taking that into account, the game doesn’t sound all that great on paper. And I’ll be brutally honest — it isn’t. But that’s the thing about candy: once you embrace the sugar rush, you don’t want to revert back to cabbage leaves and, well, boring blocks.

If not for the bubblegum aesthetics and sugary setting that Candy Crush proudly represents, King wouldn’t have a memorable product on its hands; it would have a fairly generic match-three puzzler with barely any teeth to make a dent in the culinary field. As it turns out, though, Candy Crush does have something of a cult-like charm to it. And not just a charm, but a treasure trove of stages that can keep even the most idle players stacking chocolate bars and cakes for weeks, months, even years. Courtesy of its jam-packed catalog of levels, challenges, and bite-sized incentives, Candy Crush has that special place in the heart of most Android and iOS devices. It’s a common fixture that’s a small part of the furniture, and you either love it or you hate it. Like Flappy Bird, then.

There is one thing that dampens Candy Crush’s oh-so-wholesome aesthetic: the microtransactions. See, where the game does lean into its free-to-play format and grant you unlimited access to a seemingly infinite supply of candy-clotted stages, it does also foster a few irritating features, such as Gold Bars, which can be used to purchase additional moves, general boosters, and even swifter results to help you advance a lot quicker through its yellow brick road of sugary snacks. Thankfully, it isn’t mandatory to purchase Gold Bars to enjoy most of Candy Crush’s offerings. That said, the game does make a habit of spoon feeding you the notion that, if you invest in the game and dig deep into your back pocket, then you’ll wind up with a lot more to sink your teeth into. It’s tedious, though not enough to steer you toward an alternate candy store. Still, a microtransaction is a microtransaction — so there’s also that to consider, sadly.

If you can gloss over the cheekiness of the freemium model that Candy Crush houses, then you shouldn’t have an issue with simply enjoying the game for what it is: an easy time-wasting experience that fits snugly into your daily routine. It’s also incredibly easy to learn on the go, too, with little to no learning curve to tackle or uphill climb to conquer, either. Granted, the levels do progressively increase in difficulty over time, but if you can ignore the frequent badgering that hails from the Gold Bar prompts, then you might just find that it’s rather easy to switch off and roll through. It’s still a pain in the backside I’ll admit, but at least it supplies a small dose of dopamine to keep your spirits high. Swings and roundabouts, I guess.

All in all, Candy Crush is still the same addicting mobile puzzler that it was back in 2012. Scratch that — it’s bigger, bolder, and bulkier than ever, with thanks to its ever-evolving catalog of stages and seasonal events and challenges. To that end, if you are new to the sugary lifestyle and have yet to decide whether or not to give in to the global sensation, then consider this as a push in the right direction. If you enjoy daily puzzles and gloopy confections with annoyingly vibrant colors, then frankly, you will probably adore just about every jello block and sugar cube that flesh out Candy Crush.

Verdict

Candy Crush continues to linger on the back of our tongues as a sweet yet obnoxiously bitter puzzler that launders the texture of a wholesome confection and the taste of pure and unadulterated monetization that sadly squashes its bubbly appeal. While still a brilliant time-wasting application that combines the sweet, sweet nectar of basic puzzling with an evergreen aesthetic that’s as timeless as the beloved cocoa bean, the sour grapes here are frustratingly apparent. True enough, Candy Crush has something of a sweet spot for in-game transactions and somewhat shameless marketing ploys, and regrettably, it drags down an otherwise perfect afternoon delight.

Thankfully, you don’t need to dig all that deep into your back pocket to enjoy Candy Crush for the simple dopamine injection that it is; you just need the ability to withstand the frequent spoon feeding and the badgering that connects you to the Gold Bars. If you can turn a blind eye to all of that, then you’re sure to find enough here to quell your sweet tooth for all eternity.