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SSX: 5 Mountains That Ended Up Conquering Us

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SSX boasts some of the gnarliest and most brutal feats in all of the known snowboarding world. With death-defying mountains and caverns of ice-glazed obstacles forever brewing blizzards to break their battle-hardened boarders, they've become a staple on the extreme sports genre, and also things that many of us have once feared or, on occasion, fell victim to.

Over the last couple of decades, we've soared mind-boggling heights and carved up more downhill courses than any other game EA has thrown at us. And it's because of that experience, that we've also had to endure the agony of so many unforgiving track designs and fight tooth and nail just to descend them without rage quitting. Just take these five as a few examples of how brutal SSX can be — and has been since its debut in 2000.

 

5. Mount Slaughter (SSX 2012)

SSX - It's Cold Out Here Achievement / Trophy Guide

We'll jump right into one of the most brutal tracks SSX has ever conjured and paint Antarctica and its Mount Slaughter region right on the map. As one of the final Deadly Descents of the world tour, you're goal is to not only survive its rocky terrain — but to also conquer its icy cold temperatures and avoid succumbing to the outlandish environments.

Of course, having a wingsuit comes in handy when you're descending at rapid speeds through a labyrinth on twisted arcs and ravenous storms. But having said that, its unpredictable design prevents you from tackling it with ease, and throws more curveballs at you than you can bare to face. It is, in essence, everything you'd expect from a course based in the white deserts of Antarctica.

 

4. Aloha Ice Jam (SSX Tricky)

SSX Tricky - Aloha Ice Jam Showoff - 2,904,120 (TAS)

There's no hiding our undying love for SSX Tricky. Because let's face it — its courses and its beloved characters still play on our minds even after, I don't know, twenty years since its release. And like muscle memory playing its part, we're still able to slip back into its snowy world and descend every course with perfect precision.

That is, until we stumble upon the dreaded Aloha Ice Jam track, of course. It's at that point where we lose our rhythm and just curdle up into a ball on the snow-soaked slopes. Thanks to its sharp corners, dangerous obstacles and impossible gaps, it easily stacks up as one of the most frustrating courses in all of SSX. And, it even puts the likes of Tokyo Megaplex to shame, which was famous for being a total nightmare on its own.

 

3. Kick Doubt (SSX 3)

SSX 3 Kick Doubt Platinum run

While SSX 3 failed to ignite the same spark that made Tricky well-known and respected in the community, it did possess some pretty stellar tracks, as well as boast some innovative ideas surrounding its character progression and story arcs. But the thing that stood out the most — and for all the wrong reasons — was Kick Doubt, an elite course that pushed its boarders to the brink of collapse.

Again, by having an abundance of enormous gaps and high-velocity corkscrews to blitz through, Kick Doubt turns into an avalanche of nightmares, complete with extreme weather conditions and hazardous obstacles to overcome. It's ridiculously unfair, and honestly, it couldn't care less if you stumble and fall a million times over before finally conquering its salty slopes.

 

2. Tokyo Megaplex (SSX)

SSX - Tokyo Megaplex

Tokyo Megaplex to SSX is what Rainbow Road is to Mario Kart, and what the infamous Warped Wall is to Ninja Warrior. And while not technically a mountain — it does involve some pretty sketchy inclines which, of course, are mostly embellished with some of the worst obstacle courses ever drafted for a video game. But like marmite, it's one of those things you either love or hate, gravity lifts and all.

Although the Tokyo Megaplex is a fantastic course to tackle without a goal to weigh you down, its races and freestyle events are still an absolute nightmare to withstand. However, despite their mixed reviews, they continue to hold a place in the series, and have unfortunately glued to more than one chapter in the SSX anthology.

 

1. Alaska (SSX Tricky)

SSX Tricky - Alaska Race (No wormhole) - 3:27.44 (WR)

Never did I think it would be possible to tear an entire chunk out of my own hair over something as simple as an SSX track, but there you go — Alaska managed to do it. Like Tokyo Megaplex, Mesablanca and Aloha Ice Jam all bundled into one, Alaska was able to mould into one monster of a course, complete with all the horrific features you could ever want, and then some.

It doesn't matter if you're a stone-hearted killer when it comes to confronting the ice, because the fact is, Alaska will kill you. Like, it will not not hold back on torturing you for five minutes at a time with its stupidly long course and incredibly unfair layout. Master it, of course, and you'll be laughing. But chances are, you'll hate the first attempt so much that you'll never want to return. Not today, not tomorrow, not ever. Just avoid Alaska at all costs, basically. It doesn't like you.

So, how would you rank the above five? Did we miss any tracks? Let us know over on our socials here or down in the comments below.

 

Looking for more content? You could always take a look at one of these lists:

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Jord is acting Team Leader at gaming.net. If he isn't blabbering on in his daily listicles, then he's probably out writing fantasy novels or scraping Game Pass of all its slept on indies.

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