Hockey Beasts Review (Xbox Series X|S & PC)

Super Smash Strikers meets Party Animals on the ice in Hockey Beasts, an all-new, over-the-top PvP sports game in which two herds of ambitious mammals fight for a spot on the podium over short and chaotic bouts of cute but far from wholesome hockey. With arenas, ravenous teams, and slap shot controls to frame its palm-sized world, Revulo Games steps in to carve out its own take on a timeless sport. The question is, does it hold a candle against its closest adversaries, or is it a game that should have been left out on the ice? Let’s talk about it.

Hockey Beasts compresses the beloved ice sport down to a bite-sized backyard-like biome—a borough that, like Backyard Baseball or just about any other Little League-like sport, reduces the full length of the field to focus on a microscopic rink, with smaller teams, easier rules of play, and quicker turnaround times. While still evidently hockey, Revulo Games strives to compile all of the signature aspects into an easy-to-digest, slightly less violent online and local multiplayer experience. And for the most part, it works as a standalone party game. It might not be on the same wavelength as the NHL, but it serves its purpose as an adorable entry-level hockey game.

As the title proudly implies, Hockey Beasts is solely reliant on its mammal-heavy roster. From bulls to crocodiles, elephants to giraffes, Hockey Beasts naturally finds its place deep within the animal kingdom. And the beasts in question aren’t designed to represent a gimmick here, either, which is a good thing. Rather, each team of ravenous mammals comes equipped with their own special attributes; monkeys are quicker, whereas bulls are a lot more topside-heavy and, well, bulkier, and so on and so forth. The point is, regardless of the team you choose to side with, each session is made to feel like a fresh experience with different advantages and drawbacks.

As Hockey Beasts is a beginner-friendly game at heart, the general controls are rather straightforward to learn. True to the point of any good imitation of a hockey game, you can skate at daringly high speeds, collide with other players, battle for the puck, and slap the living daylights out of said puck to snag a goal. It isn’t all that complicated, and frankly, you could quite easily master the basics in less than twenty or thirty minutes. The only problems you have to endure here, of course, are the team dynamics and the general act of learning what makes each faction tick. Are elephants stronger than bulls? Do monkeys have a higher chance of being able to slap the puck? Naturally, the game provides you with a few basic questions, and it hopes that you’ll stick around long enough to find the answers.

Of course, Hockey Beasts is just as much about wreaking havoc on the ice as it is about hitting that perfect slap shot. Like any good, albeit oftentimes frustrating party game, not a lot of what you see here is fueled by logic. In several instances, you may find yourself accidentally scoring, or even ricocheting the puck from the slender neck of a vengeful giraffe with a god complex. The point is, as each match is designed to feel quick, chaotic, and totally absurd, you never truly know how each session will unfold. Learning the ropes is a good start, but when it comes to the rink, it doesn’t really matter.

All in all there is a lot of fun to squeeze out of Hockey Beasts. While it sadly lacks the usual campaign-heavy tropes and traditional progression elements, it does make up for its shortcomings with several great features. With some equally stacked teams, multi-purpose rinks, and online tournaments to knuckle down on, Hockey Beasts does bring a good chunk of content to the table. Like all party games, though, it’s an experience that is far better suited for like-minded players, and not, say, the NHL veterans who simply wish to frontline authenticity and turn a blind eye to illogical rules of play.

Speaking of illogical rules of play, Hockey Beasts is an incredibly bizarre game that, while still a proud representative of the sport, prefers to levy authentic simulation elements with comical and oftentimes nonsensical practices. Strangely, though, its lack of a proper structure is what makes it all the more enjoyable to play in quick-fire sessions. Is it always fair? Absolutely not. Is it still a lot of fun to play after a gruelling shift at the office? Yes. Personally, I think that’s what matters most here.

Let it be said that, if you are on the lookout for a game that openly confronts NHL 27 in its own backyard, then you will probably be in for quite the surprise with just how little Hockey Beasts brings in comparison. That being said, for a generously low asking price, it offers a perfectly passable entry-level experience that can keep your and up to five friends entertained for a handful of hours. If that’s something that tickles your fancy, then you should definitely consider breaking the ice with Hockey Beasts the next time that itch prevails.

Verdict

Hockey Beasts will never be the perfect centerpiece in the NHL’s backyard, nor will it ever secure its place as the greatest hockey game, for that matter. But of course, Hockey Beasts isn’t a game that tries to knock it out of the park, but rather, a laughably entertaining underdog that serves only to supplement your cravings for the ice with a budget-friendly experience with lighter mechanics and paper thin guidelines. And, if we’re being honest with you, that in itself is enough to turn the tide in its favor. Sure, it’s a little light on content, and it quite clearly lacks all of the usual hallmark elements of a decently-sized NHL-like game. However, it does make good on its promise to bring a bite-sized slice of hockey to your front room. It just needed an elephant and a giraffe to lift the puck.