Carpet Cleaning Simulator Review (PC)

Carpet Cleaning Simulator needed a buoy to keep it afloat. Heck, if it really was as simple as scrubbing a carpet with a squeegee, then I’d have lost interest and swiftly returned to PowerWash Simulator long before the second or third rug. To my surprise, though, there was something that kept me going. It wasn’t the small things like the upgrades and the pockets of cash that kept me hooked. Rather, it was the fact that I had no time to spare, and, of course, a meeting with a meteor shower that threatened to squash humanity if I didn’t make the right choices.

At first, I thought Carpet Cleaning Simulator would be an easy way to unwind. Like PowerWash, I figured, if it would solely entail a simple scrubbing procedure and a handful of upgrades, then I’d have nothing to fret about. I could rinse and repeat the same steps, and then earn a few bucks to fuel alternate business ventures. After scrubbing the foam pearls from several rugs, however, the clincher soon began to reveal its roots. It wasn’t solely about cleaning rugs and earning a few bucks; it was about forming the backbone of a business in the wake of catastrophe.

The last thing I want to do is paint Carpet Cleaning Simulator as some kind of nail-biting rogue-like. It isn’t that. To tell you the truth, it is precisely what it says it is on the box: a chore core simulator in which you, well, clean carpets. However, there is a second layer to this sudsy world, and it doesn’t take all that long for it to reveal its contents and to start asking you questions. What will you take with you to the next life, and what will you choose to sacrifice for a quick cash injection while the skies are still radiant?

Carpet Cleaning Simulator spreads its short life over a series of straightforward cleaning tasks. Like most House Flipper–like projects, it invites you to foam, rinse, and repurpose old rugs, and earn a small wage. As you earn your paycheck, the game offers you the opportunity to upgrade your tools and tackle tougher jobs. For example, with enough cash in your pocket you can unlock a squeegee that’s quicker and more efficient. But, herein lies the problem: temporary upgrades can only be used during the course of the pre-meteor phase. In other words, you cannot bring your upgrades with you to the afterlife.

The general purpose of Carpet Cleaning Simulator is to juggle your upgrades and build a repertoire that can be taken with you to the next stage in your journey. With enough cash, you can unlock permanent tools and abilities, which you can, for some reason, bring with you to the second, third, or fourth stint. Granted, it doesn’t really explain any of this, but then, it doesn’t need to, either. Again, it’s a game about cleaning rugs. Frankly, there isn’t much point in dwelling on the fine print.

In a rogue-like fashion, Carpet Cleaning Simulator operates on a right schedule. During each shift you take on similar jobs for a chance to earn an income, and then you decide whether or not to splurge on an upgrade that can help you achieve your goals a lot quicker, or on long-lasting benefits that can aid you in the long run. Again, there isn’t much of a point to any of this, though the devil is quite clearly in the details. After all, it’s not like you would pick up a game like Carpet Cleaning Simulator for its plot.

Carpet Cleaning Simulator isn’t all that different than House Flipper. The only major difference between the average flipping sandbox and this project is the focal point. Alas, it isn’t about knocking down walls and fitting ventilation systems; it’s about scrubbing the grime from old carpets and watching their former colors jolt back to life. And, as much as it pains me to admit it, it does make for an annoyingly satisfying graft. It’s a simple one that doesn’t do a lot more than what it says on the tin, but it’s also a game that plays into the niche incredibly well. Not that there’s much to get wrong with a game about cleaning rugs, mind you.

The actual legwork phase is simple. It’s so simple, in fact, that you could quite easily sweep through the dirt and clutter with one arm tied behind your back. Like many chore core simulators that have come before, it primarily involves three or four basic steps, each of which involves a sweep-and-soak process. With a squeegee, you collect dirt, build foam, and then rinse leftover particles from the surface. The clock resets, and then you make an investment before tackling the next object. It’s as simple as that.

With all of the above said, Carpet Cleaning Simulator is more of a sprint than a jog. Given that you have no customers to work with, contracts to fulfill, or viable business goals to gradually work towards, there isn’t a huge game with a lot of depth here. With little to no major endgame content or post-game incentives to look forward to, you do have something of a short, one-and-done cleaning gig on your hands. For the low asking price, it gets the job done. That being said, to say that this is a graft that’ll keep you invested for the long haul just wouldn’t be true.

Verdict

Carpet Cleaning Simulator’s three-hour runtime feels fitting for what is, in all fairness, a rather generic AI-driven soapbox built on chore core slop. Don’t get me wrong, it does make for a rather satisfying experience, and its clever use of rogue-like progression and tool upgrades ensures that it has a hook to fall back on. Still, what you see here is what you get: a simple, clean, and effective graft that gets the job done with the tools it has at its fingertips, yet also leaves an equal amount to be desired. But that’s Carpet Cleaning Simulator, in a nutshell.