Post Office: Tidy Up! Review (PC)

It seems that wherever I go or wherever I look, I have another person’s mess to sort out—another stack of mail, another box of clothes, or another truckload of enchanted books to return to the archive. Unfortunately for me, Post Office: Tidy Up isn’t about to give me a break, either. Even though it clearly labels itself as a “cozy” single-player organizing sim, it isn’t. Well, to tell a lie, it is cozy, but it also harbors a sense of familiarity that, frankly, I’ve just about had it up to here with. I don’t want to sort through the mail. I think, really, I just want to quit at this point.

The last thing I’d want to do is put a downer on a game like Post Office: Tidy Up, because at the end of the day, it isn’t a bad game. Though, it isn’t a great game, either. Really, it’s a product that falls into the middle of an overwhelmingly large market—a pocket that, thanks to Librarian, has become all the rage, for better or worse. And while this isn’t technically a bad thing, it is an annoying thing, given that most games have since tried to imitate that same concept without doing anything, well, fresh or exciting. Post Office: Tidy Up, while visibly in receipt of a “new” product, sadly keeps to that same generic pattern, with a warehouse of clutter, a branch of skills, and a painfully obvious task that you could quite easily accomplish with your hands tied behind your back.

Post Office: Tidy Up is exactly what you think it is: an organizing sim in which you, the unfortunate colleague with a lead weight on your shoulders, tend to the aftermath of an earthquake. A post office containing over three thousand packages idle before you, and a roadmap of various countries, couriers, and symbols outline a gargantuan task that, for some reason, only you can complete. And that’s essentially all that you’re doing here: returning parcels to their rightful pigeon holes in a sorting office. There are no magical effects, no glitzy spells, and no furry companions to pat you on the back at the end of each shift. It’s just you, the mail, and a lingering silence. The pay stub isn’t even that great, either.

If you’ve played through one sorting game in the past, then honestly, you’ve more than likely played Post Office: Tidy Up, too. Conceptually, it’s the same basic gig, only without the usual frills and flamboyancy of an enchanting locale and a soothing soundtrack to keep your sanity from plummeting to an all-time low. But that’s a post office for you: dull, dead silent, and devoid of life. As for why you would want to work in such an environment is another question. Cat Mail Co. had, well, cats and the odd curiosity to pique your interest. Post Office: Tidy Up, on the other hand, offers little more than brown envelopes and minimum wage. Joy.

Don’t get me wrong, Post Office: Tidy Up can feel rewarding at times. Like most of its kind, it does occasionally provide you with the brief sense of satisfaction—a feeling that, honestly, you have to work your fingers to the bone to find. As the title suggests, it’s all about tidying up a post office—a task that, with all due respect to the local couriers, isn’t well regarded as a “fun” activity. And if we’re being honest, Post Office isn’t a naturally entertaining game. It’s monotonous legwork that, frankly, isn’t all that enjoyable, to begin with. Unlike, say, Librarian, you don’t have any magical infusions or wizard-like elements to keep you company. Instead, you have a boring old sorting room and a whole bunch of boring old boxes, nothing more, nothing less.

Similar to most Librarian clones, Post Office: Tidy Up comes with a simple routine. In order for you to complete your shift and cash in on that ever-elusive paycheck, you must identify each package by their courier label, symbol, target destination, and pigeon hole number, and then return them to their rightful location in the sorting office. As time advances, you can use your newfound sorting skills to unlock better upgrades, some of which allow you to carry more cargo, others that allow you to quickly identify packages and their respective lot numbers, and so on and so forth.

Needless to say that, as far as “cozy” organizing sims go, Post Office: Tidy Up isn’t one for reinventing the wheel or dabbling in uncharted waters. If anything, it’s all very by-the-numbers, in that it leans on almost all of the same aspects to construct its world. The problem is, unlike most of the Librarian ilk, Post Office doesn’t foster a pleasant environment, or at least a setting that you want to stick around in for the long haul. Granted, it can be satisfying, to slowly rebuild the sorting office and return all of the boxes to the shelves. That being said, there just isn’t a lot to a post office. It’s bland, boring, and sadly, about as welcoming as one might expect of a brown-coated warehouse.

Let it be said that, while Post Office: Tidy Up isn’t the prettiest of organizing sims on the market, it is a game that will likely appeal to a niche audience. Nevertheless, if you’re hoping for a game that will hold a candle to the likes of  Librarian, then you might want to consider looking elsewhere to get your fix. Post Office doesn’t do much, other than, perhaps, make me feel sorry for local couriers during the festive period.

Verdict

Post Office: Tidy Up! envelopes a barebones, brown-coated sorting office of duct tape and cardboard in an effort to appeal to an established recipient—a niche republic who are known for their love of Librarian-like escapades. Unfortunately, due to its lack of pizzazz, charm and glitzy effects, it fails to reach its final destination as a complete package. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a passable organizing game, but it’s also rather drab, boring and lacking in any form of characterization. But then, maybe that’s a post office, in a nutshell. If so, then I feel awfully sorry for the couriers.