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5 Video Game Characters You Definitely Shouldn’t Fight

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Fight

Chances are, you too have waltzed into a room, strapped to the core in more than enough confidence to wipe the slate clean. Whether it’s a roster of unruly racers or an arena choc-full of unpleasant NPCs — the point is, we’ve all felt that level of power before — and we’ve all wanted to fight our way to everlasting victory, ready to obliterate anything that dares cross our path. And that’s all well and good, for sure. Only, curveballs come in by the motherload when we least expect them, and that power that hangs over us can ultimately vanish if we dare turn a blind eye to caution.

It’s true, video games like to hand us power — just the same as they like to test our skill with spools of enemies that can effectively annihilate us without lifting a finger. And while some foes are definitely worth going out of the way for, just to bag the t-shirt and snag the postcard, many aren’t really worth the time and stress. Some, believe it or not, are best left out of the picture, for the sake of our sanity. Just take look at these five, for example. It’s safe to say that, even with maximum skill points pocketed, these overpowered creatures just aren’t worth the hassle.

 

5. The Witch (Left 4 Dead)

Just don’t startle the witch, okay?

Picture this: you’re on the final stretch of the chapter, ready to stroll through the checkpoint and into the next level when one final obstacle lures out to you. The distant sobbing echoing from a nearby alley. It pulls you in, tearing you away from your teammates as you unearth its shadowy lair. You finally close in on it, only to realise that you’ve entered the witch’s playground, and your only hope is to turn back — or do something drastic. And when I say drastic, I mean tossing a Molotov at the back of its head, hoping it won’t bat an eyelid. But it does. It bats many, many eyelids.

Sure enough, it became so well-known during the Left 4 Dead series that, once the piercing cry of the shadowed witch would come into play, players would immediately divert the route and go around it. But then, unsurprisingly, there were the others; those who assumed they could go toe-to-toe with the source, desperate to frame the cherry-red eyes of the pale witch on a mantlepiece somewhere. The only problem being, of course, was that toying with the shrieking demon would only lead to an unruly demise. But then, what would Left 4 Dead be without a game of cat and mouse with the beloved witch?

 

4. The Greybeards (Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim)

I wouldn’t advise messing with a Greybeard, to be honest.

Like you, I thought I could battle the Greybeards and still come out of High Hrothgar without so much as a papercut to plaster. But it turned out, I couldn’t so much as leave the sky-high monastery without having to reload multiple saves and backtrack to safety. Of course, that all stemmed from making one of the biggest mistakes of my gaming career, which was, for some reason, punching a Greybeard in the nose. Admittedly, I initially thought nothing of it, and that, oddly enough, he too wouldn’t have thought anything of my rash decision to attack a monk. But I was wrong. So very, very wrong.

Arriving at High Hrothgar, the monastery that rests at the apex of The Throat of the World, it’s easy to react based on impulse. Of course, being at the pinnacle of Tamriel, it’s either soak up the jaw-dropping views, leap from it to almost certain death…or, you know — punch a Greybeard in the nose. But honestly, I wouldn’t suggest the final option, seeing as a single Greybeard has far more power in their little finger than your entire arsenal. So, do yourself a favour and avoid confrontation with the spiritual folk up in High Hrothgar. They really aren’t worth the trouble, believe me.

 

3. Morgan Freeman (South Park: The Fractured but Whole)

Whatever you do — don’t hit Morgan Freeman in the pelvis.

Like Chuck Norris, Morgan Freeman has fortified his place amongst the internet legends, becoming an ongoing figure in social and meme culture. And that has also carried over into video game form, with the freckled-faced icon securing a spot in South Park as a taco store owner and, eventually, a mentor to your character. However, like most things that feature in South Park, if you make the bold choice to either hit it or fart on it — then you’re essentially lining yourself up for a consequence of some sort. And Morgan Freeman, of course, was no exception to that formula in The Fractured but Whole.

Strike Morgan Freeman in the pelvis once or twice and you’ll be warned. Strike a third time, however, and you’ll quickly find yourself and your team sprawled out in the arena, fending off the toughest NPC in the game. With a loaded 9999 health and a mighty array of powerful attacks, Freeman pretty much holds the keys to your fate, be it a quick death or prolonged torture. The good news, of course, is that you can actually defeat him and bag yourself a sneaky trophy in the process. But, eh, just don’t expect it to be a breezy battle.

 

2. Lu Bu (Dynasty Warriors)

“Don’t pursue Lu Bu!”

It’s become a running theme for Dynasty Warriors, tucking Lu Bu away in some of the toughest battles in the series. It’s also become well-known that, due to his ridiculously high-powered attacks and overall aura, players would ultimately complete the stage without so much as brushing shoulders with the towering foe. And to add to that, allies in-game would even go as far as warning you not to “pursue Lu Bu” ten times over for whenever he touched the battlefield. But like reverse psychology in its rawest form — we would often take that as a challenge, unaware of the consequences at the end of it.

While Lu Bu can be defeated on the easier difficulties without boarding so much as a scratch, higher settings can effectively lead to some pretty daunting battles. Lu Bu, despite being a single foe among thousands, can pretty much destroy you with two or three well-placed sweeps of a studded spear. And considering a single battle can take anywhere from twenty to forty minutes, going toe-to-toe with the general can essentially wipe your slate clean and have you replaying the whole stage again. So, it’s probably best not to pursue Lu Bu after all, eh?

 

1. Nemesis (Resident Evil 3: Nemesis)

Fight

Just don’t be a hero…

Way back when Resident Evil was still finding its feet as a gaming platform, Capcom would essentially toy with creatures of all shapes and sizes, desperate to fuse the best of the best into future releases. But come 1999, Resident Evil 3 would go on to introduce the finest monster of them all. Nemesis, bound to his trusty grenade launcher and thick leathery trench coat, would finally pave the way for the series, fortifying the franchise as one of the greatest in the survival horror world.

Rounding back to the big guy himself — Nemesis did make quite the impression on gamers way back when the title launched on PlayStation. Like nothing else people had seen before, his abrupt appearances and overwhelming characteristics would make necks crackle and spines corkscrew in terror for whenever he would make an unplanned visit. And when that did happen, the thought of standing firm and fending off the creature just didn’t seem to cross our minds. Instead, we would dart off, usually to the nearest safe house — and assume the foetal position by the typewriter. And that, weirdly enough, became a rinse and repeat routine that we never really pulled ourselves out of.

 

Looking for more? You could always take a look at one of these lists:

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